What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Are you happy with your life?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why did the Soviet Jews hate the Soviet Union?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Woodruff departs rehab outing after taking liner to elbow - MLB.com

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Why is Matt Gaetz being investigated but not Sarah (Tim) McBride? Why do we only care about grooming when it's the Republicans doing it?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

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Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

How would you spank me if I had been sent home from a school camp because of my poor behavior?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Stock futures are little changed as investors await details on U.S.-China trade policy: Live updates - CNBC

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why do atheists love to preach against Abrahamic religions and mock God? Even if they do not fear the eternal fire of hell, pious Muslims will certainly not leave them alone and will take brutal revenge until they surrender and repent of their sins.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Injuries force USMNT to make roster changes as the Gold Cup nears - The Washington Post

Make Nazis afraid again!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?